COACH’S CORNER Why Can’t We Please Everyone?

By Eleanor Southers

Ms. Southers is a Professional Legal Coach who helps attorneys at all stages of their careers to become more successful and contented. Working one on one, Ms. Southers guides attorneys to uncover and fulfill their goals. She can be reached at esouthers@aol.com or her website: www.southerslaw.net.

Remember when Sally Field won the 1985 Oscar for Places in the Heart, with the "You Like Me—You Really Like Me" speech? After winning the Oscar for the second time, she finally knew that at least the Academy liked her. The really interesting fallout from this was the fact that the speech became so well known and scrutinized by the press and public. People had many different reactions to those words, but the mere fact that it became such a famous quote is especially important to recognize the effect of having confirmation that, at least, a certain group of people likes you.

So what can solo lawyers take away from this? We certainly want to be liked by our clients, especially because, if a client likes us, he or she will refer more business. We want to be liked by the Judges before whom we appear, so that they will be on our side or at least not rule against us unfairly. We want to be liked by our colleagues so they will support us. And on and on.